Please ensure Javascript is enabled for purposes of website accessibility

Launched in 2014 to support bereaved children, young people and their families in North Hertfordshire and Stevenage, our focus is on providing support, information and advice for bereaved families, regardless of when or how they have been bereaved.

Our team of mental health professionals, bereavement specialists and volunteer bereavement supporters work together to provide high quality support and information.

Star

Who are we?

In 2012 a countywide survey of those bereaved in childhood was conducted by Hertfordshire Community NHS Trust (HCT) and it was found that in North Hertfordshire and Stevenage there was a lack of provision to offer support to children, young people and their families after the death of someone close to them. The research established that there was NO dedicated community-based children’s bereavement service in the area and no statutory requirement, at that time, to provide bereavement support for children and families, despite a growing body of research evidence that demonstrated the long-term negative consequences of unresolved grief.

In 2013 HCT formed a focus group of bereaved children who described what would be helpful to them. They said that they wanted to understand and find ways of managing their feelings and behaviour, and to meet with others in similar circumstances which would reduce the social isolation and stigma caused by bereavement and build an enduring connection to the person who died. Having established no other bereavement charity in the area offered a groupwork programme for children and young people and guided by the wishes of the young people in the focus group, a clinically validated psycho-educational therapeutic groupwork programme was developed.

HCT engaged with the local community who set up a trustee board, trained volunteers and in 2014 Stand-by-me (named by the children in the focus group) was handed to the trustee board. In March 2015 Stand-by-me attained charity status.

Our Groupwork Programme: This brings together children of similar ages to give them an opportunity to meet others in similar circumstances, learn about how to manage their emotions in a therapeutic environment so they can achieve their potential. In 2020, we launched our Parent/Carer Groups. This groupwork project lead by our Bereavement Support Manager and volunteers provides information and advice to parents on how to support their children and allows them to explore their own grief.

Contact-me: In July 2016 we launched our “Contact-me” schools project. This was in response to feedback from the children and young people with whom we had worked who said they needed ongoing support during their life at school. ‘Contact’ is a programme provided within the school where the bereaved child/young person identifies one person within school who remembers the circumstances of their bereavement over time and can offer support when there may be difficulties like anniversaries. ‘-me’ is the support Stand-by-me gives to schools to manage ‘Contact’ in the form of network meetings and an advice service. Following support from the Rotary Clubs of Hitchin in 2018/9, we now have 76 local schools who provide the Contact-me programme.

Young Ambassadors: In September 2017, we launched our Young Ambassador programme, funded by the Hertfordshire Community Foundation, following feedback from some of the children and young people who had taken part in our groupwork programme asking whether they could become ‘ambassadors’ for our charity. We listened and devised a programme to teach these young volunteers a variety of skills including interviewing, video making and presentation skills. Our objective was to have 6 Young Ambassadors by August 2018; we now have 10.

Parent/Carer Groups: in May 2020, we were able to expand our service to offer more support to parents/carers. The parents/carers of the children and young people who are attending group, are invited to meet on a weekly basis to gain support and advice on how to support their child and tips on how to manage their own grief.

Star

Join Us!

By joining us we can raise the awareness of childhood bereavement and ensure that those children and young people get the support they need to fulfil their dreams for the future.

To see how we can work together to change the lives of bereaved children and young people, see our Get Involved page. Alternatively, contact helen@stand-by-me.org.uk or call 07388 084086 to discuss further.